Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Silver Linings.

Yesterday was Dusty's two week checkup and everything looked great!  His doctor was very pleased with the progress he has made.  He has kind of left it up to Dusty as far as what he feels he can do and when he can go back to work.  Typically, people who have this particular surgery are able to return to work within two weeks.  However, since Dusty is a welder and his job consists of primarily being bent over, lifting/ moving heavy materials etc, the doctor really wants him to take another couple of weeks off.  He will begin physical therapy twice a week for the next eight weeks to help get strength and endurance back to his core.  Thankfully, we don't have to make another trip to LA until June for his next appointment! 

How am I?  Well...hormonal would probably be the best and only way to describe the mood swings lately.  Lol.  Physically, I'm feeling good for the most part.  My pain has definately increased, but not to an unbearable point.  My discomfort is now general end of pregnancy pain...swollen feet as soon as my feet hit the floor in the morning,  incredible back pain, there is just really no comfortable way for me to sit/ stand/ lay down anymore.  Come on May 15!!

My emotions have been all over the place.  I only have about 4 weeks until baby girl makes her debut and our solo time with Addy comes to an end.  While I am SO excited about this baby and seeing these two girls grow up together, I'm also a little sad about how it will change my relationship with Addy.  I wanted this time before baby comes to be spent with Addy doing special mommy/ daughter things, but because of all the extra crap this pregnancy has come with, I literally have NO energy anymore to do much.  Between all the health stuff Dusty and I have been through in the last month or so, I really feel like its been hardest on our sweet girl.  This is not at all what I had in mind!  I feel guilt when I take her to school because my one on one time with her is almost over, yet I also feel guilt when I keep her home because she loves school so much and I'm not much fun these days.  What am I supposed to do?!  Ack!!  This pregnancy is truly kicking my you know what...I don't know how women have 5 and 6 kids.  ;) Dusty says I'm being too hard on myself...which he is probably right.  I'm just ready to feel better and things get "normal" again...a new normal.

Silver linings?  
Addy likes to play "nurse"...Dusty is home for a bit longer so extra family time...Dusty is healing and getting stronger everyday...quality time with our "Bubbas" aka Duke...I have an amazing place in Addy's school that cares for her like family...we have a sweet baby girl coming in a month...my parents will be here in two months...amazing friends and family that help us whenever needed...I get to watch Ellen everyday...I'm home from work so I can look at these beautiful mountains every single day!  All good things.

The thing about Dusty and my relationship is that we always seem to overcome and end up on top!  Those that have known us for awhile, know some of the challenges we have faced head on in the past...this is no different.  Maybe we are being "challenged" again to remind us before our family grows to 4, just what a strong team we are.  That's a pretty awesome silver lining, don't ya think?!

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