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blah....and some new pics

addy is 4 months old now. that means i have had 4 months to lose this baby weight. but i haven't. i think i have lost about 33 pounds so far...maybe 35. who knows. i don't weigh myself much. i have lost more since returning to work simply because i'm on my feet literally all day long and still breastfeeding/ pumping. since i'm not really weighing myself, i know this because my pants are definately getting looser. (as of now, i am wearing only 1 size bigger than i was when i got pregnant.)

on to the "blah" part of this post. i weigh the SAME amount now that i did when i was pregnant, but none of those pre-pregnancy clothes fit me. wtf. it is so frustrating. my body is SO different now. i am wider, softer, jigglier. ugh. when to exercise is my next point of frustration. how do people do it? i am up at 4:45 to get myself and my daughter fed and ready for the day to be out of the door by 6:45. i am at work until 3:45, pick her up by 4:30, back home by 4:45. addy and i play, take our bath, play some more, eat, and then she off to bed by 7 or 7:30. by this time, dusty is home and its time to feed ourselves. when that is finished, i'm getting a load of laundry done, dishwasher emptied, and everything ready for the next day to do it all over again. i am in the bed by 9:30. when am i supposed to exercise, hmmm? :)

don't get me wrong, i am NOT complaining about my life one bit. i love it. i am so lucky to work the hours i work to get that time with addy in the evenings. plus, i don't think i look half bad for having a baby 4 months ago. :) every jiggle, stretch mark, and roll is worth it--its what had to happen to get my beautiful baby girl on this earth and i would do it all over again in a heartbeat. took 9 months to put it on.... ;)

anyways...here are some recent pictures of that beautiful baby girl i just mentioned above. LOVE her!! it is unreal how much we love her. unparalleled love.

4 months!

Monday, Addy will be 4 months old. Can you believe it? Where does the time go? Weren't we just bringing her home?! Geez! So much has happened in the last 4 months that I couldn't begin to write about all of that without it taking me all day. All I know is that life couldn't be any sweeter! What did I do before I had her? Dusty and I were talking last nite about how we don't even remember what life was like before she was here. Everything is amazing. We see the world through her eyes now--everything is fresh and new. I tear up at how much I absolutely love this little perfect being.

I know its true for Dusty and myself, but I think I probably speak for most parents when I say that once you have a child, you want to be better. You want to do things better, you want to love people better, you want to BE better. I gave a dollar to a homeless man yesterday--something that I don't normally do because of my judgements about what they might do with that money. But I did it because a thought crossed my mind--what would I want Addy to see me do right now if she were with me? Would I want her to see me lock my door and roll up my window pretending to play with the radio to avoid eye contact with this man? Or would I want her to see her mom smile at this man, give him a dollar, and tell him I hope he has a good day? It was only a dollar, I know he can't do much with it, but it was what I had and he needed it more than I did. So like I said, she makes me want to be better. I know Dusty feels the same.

I've been back to work for 3 weeks now and things are going well. We've got our new routine pretty established. I feel TIRED all the time. I have become the newest fan of coffee. It gets me from home to work, thank goodness. By the time I leave for work in the morning at 6:45, I have already been up at least 2 hours. Makes for a long day---but totally worth it!

We are going to the fair today!! We might be crazy going today, TX v OU anyone? But it is the ONLY day we could go. I'll be sure to get some pics of Addy meeting Big Tex! Here are some of our latest pictures of little miss thang!

3 month portrait!

addy got her 3 month pictures done last weekend. she looked so purdy!

week 1 is finished, time to check your schedule.

hehe! those of you who know me as a teacher understand the title of my blog. :)

i survived week one, people and it actually went a lot better than expected. in a lot of ways, it felt like i never left, but at the same time, it was like i had been gone forever. i had a lot of catching up to do. i was SO super busy that i didn't have a whole lot of time to be sad about missing addy. don't think i didn't leave school as soon as i could every day to get to her though!

it really was good to be back. my kids welcomed me with open arms as did the staff. its nice to be missed. ;) i have already noticed little differences in my teaching this past week. i absolutely look at my kids differently. i always understood that each child was someone's pride and joy, but i now know what that feels like. i get a little more why some parents forget there are other students in the classroom when they make their demands--doesn't make it right, but i do have a new perspective on it. i also felt much less stress and anxiety over my job than i normally do. the little annoying issues that i deal with on a day to day basis weren't so annoying. i think i finally realize fully that there are way more important things to fill my head and heart with. my family. :)

next weekend miss addy will be baptized. i am SO excited. my brother and only nephew (i have 3 neices) are flying in from WA!! it will be his first time to meet his new neice and i couldn't be more thrilled to get to see them. had he not been able to make this trip, he would not have met addy until next summer when she would already be 1. i am so grateful. in addition, our amazing godparents, hollie and chuck are flying in. hollie is my cousin. her and her husband (he and dusty are in one sweet bromance!) are flying in from florida. and chuck is dusty's best friend from california. friday nite, all of us grown ups are going to the new flying saucer in rockwall on the lake. can't wait to hang out with some of my most favorite people in the world. :) grandma and grandpa are getting to watch their oldest and youngest grandchildren at the same time!

here is a picture of addy from today--we were helping daddy clean out the garage!