happy anniversary

two years ago today, i married one amazing man. hard to believe that we have been married 2 years...together almost 5! we have built a pretty sweet life and made one amazing little girl. i'm so very lucky. so glad dusty is mine--couldn't navigate this world with anyone else--wouldn't want to!

survived day 1.

so i made it...and only a few tears were shed this morning. i got the major crying out of the way friday morning, i guess. i'm still feeling blue though. i picked her up about 4:15, she fell asleep, and didn't wake up until 5. we took a bath and ate one last time and she was asleep in bed by 7:00. that's only about and hour and a half of awake time with my baby girl. i'm having a hard time adjusting to it. i worry that she will forget who i am. and i'm a little jealous that others are getting all that time with her during the day. this sucks. am i crazy to think that she might forget me? please tell me i am.

school was good. i was so thrilled to see my kids. i had one say, "ms. leslie, i thought i lost you." isn't that precious?! another one gave me a kiss on the cheek! they made me feel so good to be back with them. i was also warmly welcomed by everyone in the building...other teachers giving me hugs telling me welcome back and asking how i was doing. it felt great. it reminded me of why i LOVE where i work so much. it really is so much like a little family.

all in all it was a successful day. i am tired. a different kind of tired. and i miss my little one. i might just watch her sleep tonite. :)

hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work i go

tomorrow is my first day back to work. i'm a mosh pit of emotion. i'm excited to see all the faces i have missed, i'm anxious about getting my butt out of the door on time tomorrow morning, i'm excited for the day to be over with already so i can get my baby girl. oy vey.

i will miss my little ray of sunshine so much. wish me luck. i'm gonna need it. ;)

last day with my daughter...

she is asleep now and my day with her is over. she starts daycare tomorrow. there is nothing i can say...i'm far too emotional :)

.....

best part of my day...my baby girl cuddling with me in my arms. i will miss these daytime naps with her when i go back to work monday....did i mention how IN LOVE i am with her?

A Mommy's Role

To all the Moms, Mommies, Mamas, Grandmas....etc!

Mother's Role - Super Hero
The other day at work, one of my clients asked me what powers I would have if I was a super hero. With out hesitation I told her I was already a super hero. She started laughing and asked why. To which I responded I grow babies and I make milk. Those are super powers. Everyone in the salon stopped and looked at me like I was insane.
Since then I have not been able to stop thinking about it. A mother's role really is a super hero. I have many super powers. Many more than just growing babies and making milk, all though, those alone would be super enough. The more I've thought about it, the more I am inspired by a mother's role. We don't just change diapers and clean up messes. We change lives. We bring comfort and security. We save the day. Isn't that what the comic book super hero's do?
I have already mentioned my ability to grow babies and make milk, but here are some of my other super powers, that I am sure I share with many other super moms.
~I have the ability to calm a fussing baby just by looking at her, I can then make the now calm baby smile and laugh just by smiling at her. All this without even touching her.
~I can make booboo's stop hurting with a kiss.
~I can fix toys.
~I can reach really far under the couch to get lost toys.
~I can carry a wiggly infant and a ginormous toddler and walk speedily to any destination.
~I can change diapers in the dark with my eyes closed. (I may even be asleep during this.)
~I have x-ray vision, I can see things behind me and in other rooms. Which allows me to bust a toddler for naughty and/or dangerous behavior.
~I have super hearing, which aides the above mentioned busting.
~I can feed the kids, do laundry, work on the computer and pick up the house all at the same time.
~I can breastfeed one baby while chasing the other.
~I can make anything scary not scary with a hug.
~Touching me at all makes things safer and easier.
~I can keep a busy toddler happily entertained for more than two hours in the Doctor office waiting room.
~I know the answer to all questions (so far, and I'll google it when I don't)
~I love them even when they are screaming/crying/puking/pooping
~I can run faster than a speeding bullet when my child is in danger.
~I can leap tall buildings, fences, security gates and just about anything else that stands between me and babies.
~I am stronger than ten men when the situation needs it.
~I can decipher my infants cries and know exactly what she wants.
I am sure that as my children grow older and continue to multiply, I will find more super powers that I possess. A mother's role is the greatest job on earth. It has brought me so much joy and happiness. I have found new strengths and talents I never even knew I had. It makes me feel strong and powerful. It is up to me to raise these kids, to mold their lives. I just hope I can live up to such a task.
So here is to all the Super Moms out there. We are the greatest Super Hero's there are.

Bumbo Time!

Addy got a bumbo!! She looks like such a big girl!!!

Welcome to the world, Ruston!

My bestie had her baby this morning!!! Alyson and Danny gave birth to Ruston Daniel at 12:02pm!! Yippeee!! Congrats to the new parents!!!! I am so sad I couldn't be there with her today. I can't wait until we get to meet this little man!

some pics from the week! :)

Here are just a few random pictures of addy's week...she is 3 months this week. man, time flies!

This was Labor Day weekend...4 generation photo. My grandma, my mom, me, and my daughter! Aren't we purty?!

Tummy time! She started rolling from her back to her side this week! Yay!!

Addy hanging out with her boys on a lazy Saturday evening!

Look closely...she actually grabbed a toy on her playmat! Well...to be honest...I put it in her palm and she grasped it-held on for a solid 3 or 4 minutes!

Change the subject...but, take a look at what is in my garage!

Jealous? You should be! Hah! This is my Grandpa's original 1955 Chevy. He has left it in Dusty's care to work on it and put it in some shows. Isn't it purty?!

Getting closer to the end...

of my maternity leave. ugh. i try not to think about it, but it manages to creep up in my head all the time and i get this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach and a lump in my throat. maybe if i get it out of my system, i might feel better. i know what you are all thinking...that i shouldn't think about it and enjoy my last couple of weeks with her. i hear ya, and i am. but that doesn't mean i haven't teared up at least once (okay 2 or 3 times) a day for the past week.

i have enjoyed every single minute i have gotten with this little girl one on one. i am so blessed to have been able to take this much time with her early on in her life. i am sick over leaving her. don't get me wrong, i know she will be in great hands. its not that. i will just miss her so much. how am i supposed to go all day long without seeing that little smile? i think about how i will miss so much of her day and all the little milestones she will hit. i worry about her in the first few days wondering where she is and if she wondering where i am. how i won't be there to swoop her up and love on her when she gets upset. i know this is crazy, but i worry that she will become less familiar with me...sort of forget that i am mama. i'll miss nursing her--being the sole provider of her nourishment. breastfeeding is something that has completely taken me by surprise. i had no idea how hard it would be in the beginning, but i also didn't know how absolutely wonderful it would become. it is an unexplainable bond between her and i. what a miracle that something my body produces is all she needs to be healthy and strong. (i plan to continue to try breastfeeding by pumping at work--wish me luck--i am hoping we can make it work) i don't know how i will ever get through that first day of work. i am dreading it. technically 2 weeks from tomorrow will be the first day she goes to daycare. we want to help her become acclimated. but what in the world will i do that day? i won't be back at work, yet everyone i know will be. any ideas to keep me busy that day would be appreciated!

not to be cheesy, but it is so true--you truly don't know how much you can love something until you have a child. my heart lives outside of my body now. i am curious to see how i will do my job now that i am a mom. every aspect of me has changed since having her. i feel like i will be a better teacher because of addy. i never dreamed i would be this torn up over going back to work. i am someone who LOVES my job and is very passionate about it. but the thought of leaving my little one hurts my heart.

i know it will all be okay. she is going to a wonderful daycare that will help her to blossom even more. however, i would appreciate good thoughts and prayers sent this way to help me not only get through this, but to also enjoy every minute i get to spend with her.

love my little angel.

California Dreamin'...

We are back! We got in late last nite and were super happy to be back in Texas and in our home. We had a GREAT time while we were in Cali. I took close to 90 pictures while we were there, so I can't put all of them up. I'll try and stick with the highlights.

Dusty's best friend, Chuck, picked us up from the airport on Wednesday and took us to Grandma Toni's house. (Thank u Chuck for making the 3 hour drive to LA to pick us up! We luv ya for it!!) We got to Grandma's house around 8 that evening, had pizza, a few drinks, and just hung out. Addy really enjoyed getting to know her Grandma!

The next day, Dusty's brother and sister in law, Chad and Dawn, came by to meet their new niece. Addy was in a great mood and even fell asleep on Aunt Dawn!

Friday nite, Grandma got to babysit Addy while Dusty and I partied with Chuck and Anna. We had a blast! It was one of Anna's friend's 30th b-day. It was the longest chunk of time I have spent away from Addy and at one point in the nite, I teared up because I was missing her so much. Thank goodness Anna was there to understand the crazy new mom emotions!The next day I woke up to a slightly hungover hubby! ;) He was a hurtin unit!! He maintained and pushed through and we went over to Chad and Dawn's house for bbq and swimming. Addy even got in the pool and she LOVED it!

Later that nite we went to casino nite! Didn't win anything, but got to get dressed up and go out with my handsome husband! Addy's cousin Courtney got to watch her that nite.

We got up early the next morning and drove to Visalia to stay a couple days with Chuck and Anna. We had a great time bbq-ing and just being lazy together. I LOVE Chuck and Anna...they have been amazing friends to Dusty and I am lucky to now be their friend as well. They have to gorgeous kids who got to meet Addy. They were so sweet and good with her--Addy just loved them. Addy really loved Anna...I lost count of how many times Addy fell asleep on her!

We left Visalia and went back to Grandma's house to spend our last full day in town. Uncle Allen and Aunt Janelle came by. Addy was in a super cute mood!Our last nite there, we got to out on a motorcycle ride with Dusty's dad. He has I think 6 Harley's in his garage so we had our pick. We rode up to a little town called Springville and had some burgers at a little stand. It was a beautiful ride that I wish I had pictures of.

It was time to leave town the next morning and head back to Texas. We had a great time, but were ready to come back to our life. Addy did pretty good with all the traveling...3 hour car ride to the airport...4 more hours in a plane with 2 stops...and then 30 more min to get to our house. She was a little trooper! Can't wait to take her back out there!

Thank you Grandma Toni for opening your home to us while we there and taking such great care of us. We love you and miss you already!

Here is one last pic of Addy...tell me this isn't the cutest little thang you have ever laid your eyes on!!!